"You will recieve good news in the mail!"
So mine's about a boy who gets kicked out of the house by his father, and he's not allowed to come back until he gets the mail. So his father abuses him from the porch, throwing stuff at him until he reaches the mailbox. Seeing the mailbox, he opens it up, and mail comes crashing down at his feet.
A chicken and a lizard fall out too. But an envelope hits in him the face. He catches that in his hands. You hear the sound of an ice cream truck and he looks over at it longingly. Ripping open the envelope, its a letter addressed to the owner of the house and it says, "Congratulations, you've won 45 million dollars!" Or some awesome amount.
And the father yells at him from the porch and throws a lawn gnome at him. I'm not sure if the boy gets angry or sad, but he eats the letter, picks up the rest of the mail, and goes back home.
Also, his name is Johann.